A collection of contemporary nonsense verse for adults by UK poet Max Scratchmann. Subjects for the poems include love, death and ***, together with perennial nonsense verse favourites such as impetuous children, walruses and toasted teacakes.
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Max Scratchmann's Nonsense Poems for Teenagers and Adults | nonsense-poems.com Reviews
https://nonsense-poems.com
A collection of contemporary nonsense verse for adults by UK poet Max Scratchmann. Subjects for the poems include love, death and ***, together with perennial nonsense verse favourites such as impetuous children, walruses and toasted teacakes.
nonsense-poems.com
Rude Rhymes
http://www.nonsense-poems.com/max/funny/rude-rhymes
I may temporarily suspend the comment about refinement, as the opening poem is a fairly straightforward rude poem about Albert Venus and his multi-talented performing. The Old Git Rap. The revenge of the oldies against yoof culture (I use the term loosely). Spiritualism is all a load of bollocks, but enjoyable bollocks for all that. Short Story in Rhyme. Short Story in Rhyme. Barely makes it into the rude rhymes department, but it does score 1 F, against. Like You've Never Heard It Before….
Stranger Danger ~ A Cautionary Poem
http://www.nonsense-poems.com/max/funny/cautionary-verse/23bc-100-stranger.htm
This is the story of Vanessa de Ranger,. Who got into a car and drove off with a stranger,. Who cut of her hands and cut off her feet,. And wrapped them is parcels so clean and so neat. Then he sent them to a bishop, two priests and a pope,. And Vanessa's poor mother had quite given up hope,. Of ever seeing her daughter quite well and alive,. When a knock at the door made her think she'd survived. But, alas, on the mat was a box with her head,. That looked at her sadly and tearfully said,.
Nonsense Sex Poems ~ Hundred Pound Knickers
http://www.nonsense-poems.com/max/funny/sex-poems/96xx-099-knickers.htm
This is the story of Sarah O'Down,. A girl much neglected in her sleepy home town,. Her shoulders were broad, her feet they were large,. And her bum brought to mind an old canal barge. But she pined for a boyfriend or at least the odd fuck,. And she begged her contemporaries, What brings you your luck? And they giggled a bit, those primpers and pickers,. And said, If you must know, it's hundred quid knickers. So Sarah logged on to Coco de Mere,. She would have gone personally but she didn't have a car,.
About Max Scratchmann, Nonsense Poet
http://www.nonsense-poems.com/max
British illustrator and humorist, Max Scratchmann was born the son of a Dundee Jute Wallah in Calcutta, India, in 1956, and sold his first painting in 1973 at the age of seventeen. He published numerous cartoons and comic poems in the late 1970s and entered the ‘commercial art’ world in the early 1980s producing a Super 8mm Fanzine and then graduating to writing and illustrating for various film magazines. Follow this link to find out more about Max Scratchmann and his Graphic Art.
Valentines Nonsense Poems - Love and Laughter Collide
http://www.nonsense-poems.com/max/funny/valentines-poems
Show all the poems. If you feel that a relationship between a fish and a land-dwelling creature is unlikely, you've a long way to go before you've fully embrace the ethos of nonsense verse. The porcupine, is a beast supine, and he sings to the silvery moon,. Oh give me a girl for a bit of a twirl and a kiss that'll make me swoon,. And he spied a fish, a bit of a dish, who swam in the treacle sea,. And he said with a sigh, and a tear in his eye, yes, that is the girl for me. But the rake she shook her spi...
TOTAL PAGES IN THIS WEBSITE
16
Peculiar Poetry: The Girl with the Ampersand Tattoo
http://peculiar-poetry.blogspot.com/2012/08/shape-poem-tattoo.html
Funny poems about love, death and sex. Sunday, 19 August 2012. The Girl with the Ampersand Tattoo. Or a love of poetry that's more than skin deep. As a poetry publisher I receive a number of unusual requests for permission to reproduce or perform poems. I specialise in requests from publishers of text books for slow or backward readers, which speaks volumes for the depth (or perhaps brevity) of my own poetry. However, quite the most bizarre request I've received to date read:. Posted by Patrick Winstanley.
Peculiar Poetry: May 2012
http://peculiar-poetry.blogspot.com/2012_05_01_archive.html
Funny poems about love, death and sex. Monday, 28 May 2012. Poems for Kids: How Rude is Too Rude? One of the most enduring schoolyard rhymes in England begins "My friend Billy has a 10 foot willy." suggesting that children, even primary school children, get a frisson of excitement from rude poems. The critical thing is that the rhyme isn't graphic or gratuitous in its sexual imagery. Yes, it's a penis poem,. Last year I had the pleasure of being shown round the Roman Sexuality. Some materials in the exhi...
Peculiar Poetry: Poems for Kids: How Rude is Too Rude?
http://peculiar-poetry.blogspot.com/2012/05/poems-for-kids-how-rude-is-too-rude.html
Funny poems about love, death and sex. Monday, 28 May 2012. Poems for Kids: How Rude is Too Rude? One of the most enduring schoolyard rhymes in England begins "My friend Billy has a 10 foot willy." suggesting that children, even primary school children, get a frisson of excitement from rude poems. The critical thing is that the rhyme isn't graphic or gratuitous in its sexual imagery. Yes, it's a penis poem,. Last year I had the pleasure of being shown round the Roman Sexuality. Some materials in the exhi...
Peculiar Poetry: September 2012
http://peculiar-poetry.blogspot.com/2012_09_01_archive.html
Funny poems about love, death and sex. Wednesday, 26 September 2012. What Makes a Funny Poem Funny. Which is one of a number of poems that Paul has written based on jokes about a dogs ability to lick its own (and often other peoples') bollocks. An example of the latter might be my own poem, The Sick Note. Which aren't entirely clean, but are not sex obsessed or explicit, Indeed, Bear Necessities is included as a rude poem in our collection of funny poems for kids. To Protect and Serve. Does an Eskimo know.
Peculiar Poetry: August 2012
http://peculiar-poetry.blogspot.com/2012_08_01_archive.html
Funny poems about love, death and sex. Sunday, 19 August 2012. The Girl with the Ampersand Tattoo. Or a love of poetry that's more than skin deep. As a poetry publisher I receive a number of unusual requests for permission to reproduce or perform poems. I specialise in requests from publishers of text books for slow or backward readers, which speaks volumes for the depth (or perhaps brevity) of my own poetry. However, quite the most bizarre request I've received to date read:. Posted by Patrick Winstanley.
Peculiar Poetry: What Makes a Funny Poem Funny
http://peculiar-poetry.blogspot.com/2012/09/what-makes-funny-poems-funny.html
Funny poems about love, death and sex. Wednesday, 26 September 2012. What Makes a Funny Poem Funny. Which is one of a number of poems that Paul has written based on jokes about a dogs ability to lick its own (and often other peoples') bollocks. An example of the latter might be my own poem, The Sick Note. Which aren't entirely clean, but are not sex obsessed or explicit, Indeed, Bear Necessities is included as a rude poem in our collection of funny poems for kids. To Protect and Serve. Does an Eskimo know.
Peculiar Poetry: A Dirty Poem A Day
http://peculiar-poetry.blogspot.com/2012/08/dirty-poem-a-day.html
Funny poems about love, death and sex. Wednesday, 1 August 2012. A Dirty Poem A Day. I’ve dedicating the month of August to a hand picked selection of dirty poems by Paul Curtis. We're not talking about sex obsessed dirty poems, but rather the funny dirty poems at which Paul excels. Expect the cheeky humour of the saucy seaside postcard, updated to the sexual mores of the naughties. So you can look forward to a dirty poem a day during August to enliven an otherwise dull month for. From More Dirty Poems.
Peculiar Poetry: A Poetry-Free Poetry Blog
http://peculiar-poetry.blogspot.com/2011/04/non-poetry-poetry-blog.html
Funny poems about love, death and sex. Saturday, 30 April 2011. A Poetry-Free Poetry Blog. Peculiar Poetry has always been rather inward looking and self-indulgent. We've presented our readers with an increasingly bizarre selection of poems and that, in general, that was that. Typically, we receive one email per 100,000 site visits from someone offering praise, condemnation or themselves as a guest poet. So farewell navel-gazing, it's time to embrace the world. Posted by Patrick Winstanley.
Peculiar Poetry: April 2011
http://peculiar-poetry.blogspot.com/2011_04_01_archive.html
Funny poems about love, death and sex. Saturday, 30 April 2011. A Poetry-Free Poetry Blog. Peculiar Poetry has always been rather inward looking and self-indulgent. We've presented our readers with an increasingly bizarre selection of poems and that, in general, that was that. Typically, we receive one email per 100,000 site visits from someone offering praise, condemnation or themselves as a guest poet. So farewell navel-gazing, it's time to embrace the world. Posted by Patrick Winstanley.
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خزعبلات یک ذهن مزخرف
خزعبلات یک ذهن مزخرف. برای حل کردن مشکلاتم، بهشون فکر نمیکنم. این اندیشه چرا باید غلط باشد؟ این پاسخ درست است، اما نه به اطلاق آن. جان مطلب این پاسخ همین نکته اساسی است که تحقق پدیده ها معلق به دانستن آن نیست. اما این معنی در مورد همه پدیده ها صادق نیست. کند، دلیلی وجود ندارد که بگوییم درد هنوز هست. نهایت اینکه کسی بگوید درد هست، چون هنوز سلول های عصبی مشغول فرستادن پیام هایی حاوی درد هستند. اما این پیام ها منشأ خارجی هستند صرفا که بوسیله اصابت لیوان فعال شده اند. و همانطور که گفتیم منشأ ها نیاز ...منشأ ...
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Nonsense Poems for Kids
Nonsense Poems for Kids. Are you ready to try something a little bit different? If you've visited our sister site, Funny Poems for Kids. You'll have discovered that Max Scratchmann's funny poems are often slightly strange or spectacularly silly. But Max's nonsense verse take you a step further, into a weird and wonderful worlds where nothing is as it seems. Fluttersnoops, talking tea cakes, gymnastic tigers and Joseph, a boy who thinks he's a goat, are just some of the oddities that await. Nonsense verse...
Max Scratchmann's Nonsense Poems for Teenagers and Adults
Max Scratchmann's Nonsense Poems. Welcome to a contemporary collection of comic verse and whimsical poetry by Scottish poet Max Scratchmann. From the surreal to the silly, Max's nonsense poems follow in the footsteps of Lewis Carroll, Edward Lear and Ogden Nash, the pioneers of nonsense verse. At the same time, the collection breaks new ground, tackling the absurdities of modern life and introducing new sub-genres, such as romantic and erotic nonsense. What is nonsense verse? It makes no sense at all.
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Nonsense Poems and Prose
Nonsense Poems and Prose. Gophers dancing with marmalade jars. Jun 28th, 2009 @ 08:02 am. I wrote this one. When I was on my way back up to Seattle (from Santa Cruz), to complete the divorce process with my first ex. Trinidad is a 'beach' on the coast of northern California. WHAT IS, IS IS. And what should never be. Will never be, because. Yea Trinidad say so. He the eye in the sky. He the breath of fresh air. He the clear blue - green water. And what is, is is. Jun 15th, 2009 @ 07:20 am. After over a ye...
Nonsense Production | some say we are crazy, I say the earth is a beautiful place to life
Welcome to Nonsense Production. Some say we are crazy, I say the earth is a beautiful place to life. Landscape Photography / Architectural Photography / Sport Photography / Object Photography / Timelapse Photography. Image Movies / Sport Movies. Am Buchberg 8 Traunkirchen 4801. 111;ffice@nonsense-production.at. 2015 Nonsense Production - WordPress Theme by Kadence Themes.
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Nonsense-Prophet (Ian Jones) | DeviantArt
Window.devicePixelRatio*screen.width 'x' window.devicePixelRatio*screen.height) :(screen.width 'x' screen.height) ; this.removeAttribute('onclick')". Digital Art / Professional. Deviant for 10 Years. This deviant's full pageview. This is the place where you can personalize your profile! By moving, adding and personalizing widgets. You can drag and drop to rearrange. You can edit widgets to customize them. The bottom has widgets you can add! Some widgets you can only access when you get Core Membership.
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Caliban'S BLAh bLAh...
Blunders,nonsense,ambiguity,uncertainty and stupidity.to be modest. Saturday, December 20, 2014. Is it beating up 20 goons single handed? Is it bungee jumping off a 200m cliff? Is it driving your car at 100 kmph through city traffic? Or is it simply standing upto challenges in life, standing by your choice and going head-to-head with the consequences? Courage the Cowardly Dog would perhaps be the ideal description in one line! Will I ever be courageous enough to do the things I want? Things I wish for?
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Window.devicePixelRatio*screen.width 'x' window.devicePixelRatio*screen.height) :(screen.width 'x' screen.height) ; this.removeAttribute('onclick')" class="mi". Window.devicePixelRatio*screen.width 'x' window.devicePixelRatio*screen.height) :(screen.width 'x' screen.height) ; this.removeAttribute('onclick')". Join DeviantArt for FREE. Forgot Password or Username? Founded 11 Months ago. Featuring the realms of demons, elves, fairy-folk, ghosts and even humans. Wish to be part? Wish to be part? Feb 2, 2016.
